觸動人心的分享 觸動人心的愛情 觸動人心的故事

戀愛必備的七大素質【學會後,令對方對你愛不釋手!】

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和這樣一種流行趨勢相適應,什麼樣的愛情素質才能使我們在現代愛情中游刃有余,進退自如呢?我們試著來列出幾條。

一、相信愛情,但不迷信愛情

相信真正的愛情是存在的,但期望它會超越一切是不現實的。愛情可能隨時間的變化而變化,它的消亡不一定意味著背叛,而極有可能是自然的衰退。對愛情作如此認識,可以使我們不迷信愛情,也就不容易受傷和絕望。

二、能進也能出

投入的時候可以忘我,結果出現時該讓理性站出來,不管這種結果是婚姻的開始還是愛情的結束。這樣才能把握愛情的主動權,不在感情中迷失。所謂“該出手時就出手,該放手時就放手”。

三、主動和開放的姿態

守株待兔地等待愛情,一定會錯失很多機會,現代規則是把握時機,主動追求,蔑視追求者的人我們可以蔑視他。封閉自己是愚蠢的,封閉愛情則是徒勞的,只要建立起自信,開放只會使我們擁有愛情,而不是葬送愛情。

四、具有愛的能力

付出的能力、理解的能力、寬容的能力和自我承擔的能力。不要指望愛人會爲我們分擔一切,很多東西我們仍然需要獨自面對;付出比索取對愛情更有益,也使自己更快樂;寬容對愛情有出乎意料的效果,在要求、指責、懇求都達不到目的時,寬容也許可以奏效。

五、有一點心理彈性

享受愛情的親密,接受愛人的疏離,松和緊都能悠悠掌握。擁有的時候要珍惜,失去了就趕快轉彎,不必沒完沒了地追悼過去,相信新的愛情就在前方。

六、了解一點愛情心理學

似可得又不可得的狀態,感情最易升溫,利用這一點可以強化愛情氣氛;制造一點小障礙,會使愛者斗志高昂;愛人遇到挫折,最需安慰;新鮮花樣永遠是愛情所需。諸如此類,不一而足,用好了,會形成良性的互相激勵態勢。

七、有一點經濟基礎

雖然物質和愛情不一定成正比,但有一點物質基礎絕對有益于愛情的健康生長,不食人間煙火的愛情很難長久。“說到底,愛情是超越成敗的。愛情是人生最美麗的夢,你能說你做了一個成功的夢或失敗的夢嗎?”這是哲學家周國平先生的話,無論我們的愛情是什麼狀況,用這句話來鼓勵和安慰自己都不失爲聰明。

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